Wordling while the world burns.

Today is disconcerting.

So I saw a video of this truck with 450 horsepower got washed away when the town flooded, and I keep seeing AI art of bald eagles pecking out the eyes of the weak while the real eagles are catching this trendy new flu from the landfill rats and flying into trees on purpose.

And I keep hearing about these dangerous “others” who are lurking out “there,” doing “stuff” and being “themselves” and eating “spicy food” from these guys with mile-long domestic violence records who walk around the Kroger with loaded guns.

Meanwhile, the lady setting up my 30th high school reunion no longer has the ability to smile because the deadly toxins in her forehead migrated into her sinus cavities, which apparently made her CPAP machine less functional than it ought to be. She set up a go-fund-me to get her face rebuilt.

The slanderous plagiarism machine that I keep in my pocket keeps showing me notifications from my hermit neighbors who are warning everyone not to wear contract lenses anymore because they are “coated with ungodly liquids” that will blind us all to the FACTS and cause geriatric autism (but come one now, that’s just a fancy way to talk about lead poisoning).

I thought about planting some seeds while the planting is still possible, but instead I scrolled the slanderous plagiarism machine for a while and did the Wordle. Got it in three! Take that, authoritarianism!

The air smells like industrial-grade cremation but I’m “one of the good ones,” so I just closed my windows and watched a few Hallmark Movies until I felt better about settling for the unambitious fate I’ve been told I should want. Hashtag girlboss.

Checked my stocks and saw that for every species that goes extinct I can retire 3.5 days ahead of schedule.

Across the street from the luxury townhouses, there’s a church with a sign that says “WE STAND UNITED TOGETHER” in rainbow Helvetica. The congregation had to step over a twitching bald eagle and a homeless man (non-twitching) just to get inside last Sunday.

The email composed by an AI and sent by my coworker got an AI reply my computer made up. We carried on this non-conversation for the better part of a month and my entire LinkedIn bot-community is super stoked by the speed of technological advancement. I should probably plant those seeds.

Anyway: tell your boss you love them and don’t type anything ungood into your slanderous plagiarism machines. Tomorrow is another day: there will be a new Wordle, fresh eagle meat to scavenge for, and yet another reason or ten to plant those seeds already.